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Joke of the Day

"Harry Potter wouldn't leave me alone. I told him to Quidditch. I'll see myself out."

"Why do adrenaline junkies enjoy camping? Because it is in tents"

"My son's method of Laundry: If it's clean it's on the floor. If it's dirty then it goes on the floor over there."

"My friend collects scoliosis journals He has *back* issues."

"Why do LEGO men hate going to hospital...? Because plastic surgery costs a fortune!"

"Why can't you hear it when a pteranodon goes to the bathroom? Because they're all dead."

"Gonna let my boyfriend snort an eggroll out of my vagina while on a luge. Yeah we're having a Chinese New Year Olympic Valentine's Day."

"I just got hired as a garbage truck driver. There was no training, but I think I'll pick it up as i go along."

"I'm throwing a party for people who can't ejaculate Let me know if you can come or not"

"What's the difference between Audi drivers and a cactus? Audi drivers have pricks on the inside"