153775

Joke of the Day

"What do you call something that swims, is big and has 4 legs? A whale with a table taped to it."

"What did Hitler say to the Chinese food delivery guy that stole his Chinese food? MEIN LOMEIN!"

"[walks into bookstore] Me: do you have any books on turtles? Worker: Hard back? Me: Yeah, with little heads."

"What do you get when you mix liquor and literature.... Tequila Mockingbird"

"When a Dutch reporter asked Arjen Robben what he was going to do after the world cup, he told him; I'm going diving in Mexico."

"Depression hurts. Ask your doctor if maybe he wants to hang out Saturday night if he's not doing anything."

"What does Nixon's Head use to thicken up etouffee? A roooooooux!"

"My Friend once tried his hand at stand-up comedy My friend once tried his hand at stand-up comedy.It was so pathetic that everybody just laughed at his jokes."

"What kind of Lettuce do serve on the Titanic? Iceberg Lettuce! :D"

"The Mongols In the early days of their empire the mongols were openly mocked by their enemies for being so small and weak. Needless to say, Genghis khan really *stepped* up to the challenge."