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Joke of the Day

"When a Dutch reporter asked Arjen Robben what he was going to do after the world cup, he told him; I'm going diving in Mexico."

"What's the opposite of assault? a pepper."

"What do clouds wear under their pants? Thunderwear!"

"Sadly.. ..some frogs have been known to Kermit suicide"

"My 5 year old just ended a phone call with ""I gotta jump, Daddy. I'm out."" And now everyone in my house is officially cooler than me."

"[last supper] Jesus (to Judas): so your facebook status said you were anxious? Anything u wanted to say Judas (sweating): no not really"

"Blond joke Why was the blond happy she finished the jigsaw puzzle in six months? It said 2 to 4 years on the box."

"A sign in the Zoo: Please, do no throw bananas in the dolphins' pool! 1. The dolphins do not eat bananas. 2. By now 3 monkeys have drowned. Thanks for understanding."

"I can't get into Breaking Bad because I have trouble remembering all the little facts. For example: the name of Walter's boss at the car wash. I just need to stop getting Bogdan in the details."

"What is a large group of Sperm Whales called? Semen"