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Joke of the Day

"Dad Dragon: If we weren't supposed to eat them they wouldn't come w plates and toothpicks now finish ur damn knight Teen Dragon: I hate you"

"I don't like Nazi jokes... ...they're far beyond Mein Kampfort zone."

"Tried to make a video seductively licking the frosting from an Oreo, but got excited and ate the whole thing. Twenty times."

"What happensto nitrogen when the sun rises? It becomes daytrogen ^I'msorry"

"I just found out that my pillow has a better sex life than me It gets head every night"

"My foot just fell asleep, I'm terrified that drunk white people will notice and start drawing moustaches and penis' on it. #ILoveYallReally"

"why do you never see hippos hiding in trees? cause they're really fuckin' good at it"

"What do asparagus and anal sex have in common? The more it's forced on you as a child, the more you dislike it as an adult."

"Why do people shoot up schools? Because it increases the average IQ of the world. It's a public service."

"What do you call Batman when he leaves Church early? Christian Bale"