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Joke of the Day

"What do asparagus and anal sex have in common? The more it's forced on you as a child, the more you dislike it as an adult."

"Political opinions are like assholes If yours shows up in my Facebook feed I will probably block you"

"Marathon Just won my first marathon. I am experiencing the thrill of victory and the agony of de feet."

"Local pharmacy robbed... Local pharmacy robbed tonight. Entire stock of Viagra taken. Police on look out for hardened criminal."

"Donald Trump says he has a great relationship with the blacks But unless the blacks is the name of a white family, that's probably not the case --Seth Meyers"

"It's because it's Bring Your Daughter To Work Day, sweetie. That's why. What Papa is doing right now is called an ""autopsy"". Stop crying."

"What's the difference between the English rugby team and a teabag? A teabag stays in the cup longer! (im so sorry ;-;)"

"What do you call a flying Jew Smoke"

"What are Mario's overalls made of? Pixels."

"Unfortunately Katy Perry, I couldn't fit in the skin tight jeans so instead of a teenage dream my husband gets Blair Witch."