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Joke of the Day
"What did George Washington say to his men on March 3rd Tomorrow we march forth"
Next Joke
"Hey, smiling strangers. No thanks."
"ME: u know what they say, drink with one eye open WIFE: they don't say that, you're drunk ME: *closes other eye* it is very dark in here"
"I want ""Wake me if anything cool happens"" on my tombstone."
"Lmao this joke has no punchline because Ellen Pao"
"White smoke is coming out of my neighbor's house. He either elected a new Pope or he's got some good weed."
"What foods are still good the second or third time you've eaten them? I'm looking for food for my human centipede..."
"What did Hitler call his records store? The Vinyl Solution."
"What do you get if you cross a dick with a potato? A dictator."
"Company Invents First Truly Secure and Encrypted Smartphone They're calling it the FU NSA. (real news)"