15313

Joke of the Day

"What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being *special*"

"I'm a hard core Trekkie except instead of Star Trek, alcohol."

"A cabbage, a faucet, and a tomato had a race. The cabbage was ahead, the faucet was running, and the tomato tried to catch up."

"There are three men on a boat with a pack of cigarettes and no matches. How did they manage to smoke? They threw a cigarette overboard, and made the boat a cigarette lighter"

"Benjamin Button Started off dead Violets are blue Roses are red"

"What's the difference between when you're hungry and when you're horny Where you put the cucumber."

"Anyone else able to tie rope using telekinesis? Thought knot."

"Christmas is over, all of the guests have gone home. NO PANTS."

"How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Seriously, I gotta figure out how many slaves I need to buy"

"I went in to hospital for an operation... I asked the anaesthetist if I could administer the needle myself, and he said: ""Sure, knock yourself out""."