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Joke of the Day
"I hate jokes that rely on visual imagery. I've had it right up to here with them."
Next Joke
"I have conversational ninja skills... People don't notice when I'm talking."
"I keep a second pair of shoes at work, I don't want people to recognize me when I'm pooping."
"Want to hear a construction joke? I'm still working on it."
"When it comes to distinguishing male genitalia from female genitalia... There's a Vas Deferens."
"Past employers have described me as ""selfish, egotistic, condescending, the physical manifestation of capitalism, and a true sweetheart."""
"It's a joke. What type of bagel can fly? A plain bagel."
"Those first two guys who thought Superman was a bird or a plane...? What the fuck were they so excited about?"
"I was walking down the street earlier and saw two kids fighting As an adult I had to step in. They didn't stand a chance."
"How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? ... you pick him up and suck his dick."