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Joke of the Day

"Those first two guys who thought Superman was a bird or a plane...? What the fuck were they so excited about?"

"What is a tresspasser's least favorite number? The number 86. (No seriously. Google ""86"".)"

"I'm a masochist. I downvote myself."

"What happened to the Jew who ran into the wall with a boner....? ....He broke his nose"

"What's the difference between men and women when watching video? The phrase ""I went through a whole box of tissues watching that film."" usually has a completely different meaning."

"She asked me for time and distance. I guess she wants to calculate velocity."

"What happens if you pee on Putin's head? Urine big trouble..."

"What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns? A bull pull!"

"Guy passes a buff guy on the street and asks, ""Are you a pole vaulter?"" He says, ""No, I'm German. How did you know my name was Walter?"""

"What's the difference between God and a Welder? God doesn't think he's a Welder."