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Joke of the Day

"[meeting] DIRECTOR: I want amazing CGI PRODUCER: Yes! D: A huge cast P: Agreed! D: Realistic family photos P: We don't have the budget"

"There are 10 types of people in this world... Those who understand binary, those who don't, and those who didn't expect this joke to be in base 3."

"Spent 15 damn minutes looking for my phone in the car last night while using my phone as a light, yup that high.."

"I asked my North Korean friend what life was like there... He did reply but I don't speak Korean so I don't know what he said."

"What lives in the sea and yells? A clam shouter."

"The Bishop The bishop came to my church today. He was an impostor, he never once moved diagonally. Credit to bash.org"

"People the most gentle, loving, kind, sympathetic, peaceful and caring creatures in the world. Especially when they need something from you."

"People used to go all around the world for spices. That must have been underwhelming. ""Guys, I've been gone three years and this is cumin."""

"Label every torrent you upload with your e-mail address and other contact information so peers can thank you"

"I've done a lot of stupid stuff in my life, but at least I've never signed up at the gym in January."