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Joke of the Day

"If I had a time machine I'd go back to Germany in 1933 and change my Facebook avatar to an anti-Nazi logo."

"How many homeless people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. Homeless people don't screw in light bulbs; they screw in cardboard boxes."

"What's the difference between Mormons and non Mormons? The temperature of their caffeine"

"Who's the nicest guy at the hospital? The ultrasound guy"

"How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles!"

"The Past Present and Future... The Past Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense."

"Hillary's So Crooked.... Hillary's So Crooked She Needs A Kaine!"

"Beating the drummer (again) What do you call the hot girl on a drummer's arm? A tattoo."

"LOL there's like 20 guys w/ ""Female Body Inspector"" windbreakers that's hilarious they're seizing my hard drive & business records LMAO"

"british people say ""maths"" instead of math because they are big nerds who cannot be satisfied by a single math"