25905

Joke of the Day

"british people say ""maths"" instead of math because they are big nerds who cannot be satisfied by a single math"

"What is the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike? *Attire.*"

"How Many Running Backs Does It Take To Turn On A Light? Two. One to find the switch...the other to hit it."

"It's pronounced like ""jif."" Yeah, well I don't gif a fuck."

"Mad Max: Fury Road fans never actually watched the movie they WITNESSED it."

"Not everything Donald Trump says is stupid. The Chinese built a wall 2,000 years ago - and they still don't have any Mexicans!"

"I heard some guy tell two terrible Malaysian Airline jokes... The first one got no response and the second one was shot down in flames"

"If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? You're a-peein!"

"My British friend asked me, ""Why do you Americans drive on the wrong side of the road?"" I told him, ""Dude, we literally drive on the right side."""

"What do Mexicans use to cut a pizza? Little Caesar's"