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Joke of the Day

"Hillary's So Crooked.... Hillary's So Crooked She Needs A Kaine!"

"*locks doors and rolls window down almost a quarter of the way* ""you fellas mind not skateboarding so close to my driveway"""

"What do you get if you cross a dog and a film studio ? Collie-wood !"

"Going to see the new batman tonight, heard it got killer reviews."

"For Sale : Used Facebook account ~ get up to the minute weather forecast, religious counseling and countless pictures of Jenny's cat."

"A handshake means something completely different to a cannibal."

"Nope. Not gonna follow anyone whose name is upside down. I got enough problems."

"That's great about your engagement, promotion and new car. I grabbed the EXACT amount of hangers I needed to put away laundry. Samsies!"

"To any redditors who abuse, or have abused drugs... violence is not the answer."

"Please pray for the private school kid whose dad drops him off in a 3-year-old car."