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Joke of the Day

"LOL there's like 20 guys w/ ""Female Body Inspector"" windbreakers that's hilarious they're seizing my hard drive & business records LMAO"

"I would rather have Bill Cosby as President than Donald Trump.. because if America is gonna get fucked for 4 years I wanna be asleep when it happens."

"How do you stop the Polish army on horseback? You turn off the carousel."

"[after tee ball game] Wife: we brought snacks for the kids. Me: [w/ mouthful of food] we did?!"

"My boss is so inappropriate at work Whenever there's an opportunity for innuendo he slips it in"

"Knock knock Who's there? Dexter Dexter, who? Dexter halls with boughs holly!"

"What time does Sean Connery get to Wimbledon Tennish"

"I noticed you're eating that bag of popcorn one piece at a time. So how many people have you murdered?"

"What was Bernie Sander's favorite topic in mathematics? Radicals. He loved finding the ""root"" of problems..."

"A hummingbird is a lot like a songbird, It just doesn't know the lyrics."