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Joke of the Day
"Woman on the Drive-Thru Speaker: Will there be anything else? Me: We just met."
Next Joke
"Some say that Mexicans are bordering on the insane... But so what? So are Canadians."
"Why did Opey get fired from his job as a pizza delivery boy? Because Opey never delivered."
"Do people who use handkerchiefs know they don't have to hang on to the things that come out of their nose?"
"If you find me passed out in Austin this weekend with a penis drawn on my face at least have the decency to not tag me in the facebook pic."
"I debated suicide... I debated suicide by sudoku once. I wanted my death to count."
"Two men walk into a bar.. The first man says I'll have an H20 The second man says I'll have an H20 too, the second man dies."
"Never stop seeking knowledge. It is how we grow as a society. But if you do, go ahead and run for office."
"I don't hate you, but if you we're drowning, I would dive in and handcuff a piano to your neck."
"Adult me must concede that a major contributor to global warming was kid me leaving the front door open and heating the whole goddam world."