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Joke of the Day

"George Lucas, the creator of ""Star Wars,"" is 70 years old today. George didn't bother celebrating. He spent the day making unnecessary changes to all his earlier birthdays."

"At what point does a Lamb become a Sheep? When its had it's Baaaaa-Mitzvah!"

"Probing: Aliens have had plenty of time to figure out our biology -now they're just having fun."

"Why couldn't Bill Gates get any girls? His hardware was Microsoft"

"Did you hear the one about the Chinese Godfather? He made him an offer he couldn't understand."

"What was the deaf mans favorite song? The Sound of Silence."

"Dang girl are you the old lady from Up, because I've only been here for like 5 minutes and you're already gone."

"A hippie goes to the abortion clinic. The doctor says: ""If you want it organic, just go sit on a cactus."""

"You got me... If I asked you to have sex with me, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one?"

"I just opened a Capri Sun in the dark, sup ladies"