148149

Joke of the Day

"At least 12 dead after shooting in Paris Bet they never thought they would be killed from a magazine."

"What do you call a poo which still remains after flushing? An **UFO** - **U**nflushable **F**loating **O**bject"

"[dogs around campfire] *flashlight on face* and when I came back without the ball it was in his hand the whole time"

"Did you hear the submarine construction business closed down? Shame they went under"

"You know you are old when... You need a viagra first before having sex"

"For sale Dead Budgie Not going cheep"

"I bought my friend an elephant for their room. They said ""thanks!"" I said ""don't mention it."""

"I could tell by the scowl on her face that her patience and botox were wearing thin."

"What's it called when a fedora wearing neckbeard gets sick? M'alady"

"Why did Arnold Schwarzenegger inspire George W Bush to become president? A: Because he could explain the Bush administration's positions on civil liberties in the original German!"