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Joke of the Day

"If god came down to earth, he'd have to take the form of Morgan Freeman. At this point, anything less would be disappointing."

"The generation of today are so allergic to everything, future wars will be fought by throwing bags of peanuts and cat hair at each other."

"Can Neon form a chemical bond with Indium? NeIn."

"Aw, this paint is already dry. Guess I'll watch baseball."

"Did you hear? Chuck Norris moved to Endor He became an Ewok'er Texas ranger."

"My wife suggested I get one of those penis enlargers... ... So, I did. She's 21 and her name is Megan. PS: Even though the joke is in first person, nobody told me to get a penis enlarger."

"I never believed that my dad was stealing from his job as a roadworker But when i got home all of the signs were there."

"Guess I should've left..""Guest appearance on Cops"" off my resume"

"I was at a hat shop and the sign read, ""ALL CAPS MUST GO!"" ...and I thought what hypocrites!"

"How much did the pirate pay for corn? A buck an ear!"