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Joke of the Day

"I never believed that my dad was stealing from his job as a roadworker But when i got home all of the signs were there."

"Shoutout to the wife for stacking her shampoo bottles in the shower like she's on her last 3 turns on Jenga."

"Lame joke: ""What do you get when you combine a vampire and a snowman?"" Frostbite."

"I took a public speaking class in college. I did a presentation about Free Speech. It was mostly just about the website where I downloaded my speech."

"""Let's fly to Russia, get a bucket of water from the Caspian Sea, then put it above the door so it falls on Jeff!"" - Impractical joke"

"I have been checking Facebook less and less. If this continues, I'll eventually forget about all those people for the 2nd time."

"Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog's paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote."

"Everybody wants to change the world, but no one can find a diaper that's big enough."

"I like my coffee how I like my women... Cold and bitter"

"Why can't two blind people get along? They can't see eye to eye."