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Joke of the Day

"Which ant is the biggest? Elephant"

"My fitness instructer keeps asking if I squat. No Gary..I rent. I'm not a hobo."

"I asked a Scottish friend of mine how many sexual partners he'd had. He started counting but fell asleep. Edit: WOW my top post is now a bestiality joke. Thanks guys :)"

"(DARK) Why do mathematicians love Hitler? He had the Final Solution."

"Snail 1: Are you male or female? Snail 2: Yes Snail 1: Me too! [they kiss passionately]"

"What is the difference between a Ferrari and 4 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage"

"Judas: C mon Jesus we re gonna be late for last supper Jesus: The what?? Judas: The supper.. we re gonna be late for supper."

"Yo you guys ever try hanging out with people you like who also like you? Shit's dank af"

"I got really excited when she talked about a motorboat date, but as it turns out, she just wanted to take a ride on the lake. *sigh*"

"It is said that Bill Gates once farted in an Apple store which stank up the entire place. But after all, it's their fault for not having Windows."