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Joke of the Day

"Why'd the hipster burn his mouth? He had his soup before it was cool."

"I renamed my iPod to Titanic... it's syncing now!"

"What is the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? I didn't pay 50 bucks to have a lentil on my face last night."

"TIP: Always carry a motorcycle helmet with u. Then u never have to do your hair & u can blame it on safety & the law & stuff. #lifehacks"

"What do you call a Chinese man with a pet cat? A vegetarian."

"Bra & Hat What did the bra say to the hat? ""You go on ahead, while I give these two a lift."""

"People say I never explain myself enough..."

"""It's 3am and everyone is asleep. Must run into random rooms as fast as I can and jump on everything"" - cats"

"Turns out, telemarketers don't like it when 5 year olds answer the phone and tell them princess Ariel stories."

"Max wondered why the ball was slowing growing larger.... and then it hit him."