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Joke of the Day

"I hate that ""You know what to do"" voicemail greeting, because if a recently unfrozen caveman calls, I bet that makes him feel pretty bad."

"What U.S. State has the smallest sodas? Minisoda"

"How many Super Sayains does it take to change a light bulb? Find out next time on Dragon Ball Z!"

"We all have that one friend who returns our yacht a little too clean."

"I told my girlfriend two sentences ""We need to buy a new car."" ""I am thinking about taking a break."" She started crying. I mean, she could have just said she didn't like that type of cars."

"Have you heard the one about the untouched coal pit? Never mined."

"Why don't deaf guys eat pusseh? They never heard of it."

"A Jewish boy asked his father... for fifty dollars for a pair of sneakers. His father replied ""Forty dollars?! What do you need thirty dollars for?!"""

"What browser do you use to watch porn? Bill Gates: ""Internet Explorer"" Sundar Pichai: ""Google Chrome"" Tim Cook: ""Safari"" Jared Fogle: ""Tor"""

"(New version) How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three, one to genetically engineer people small enough to fit in a light bulb, and two to do the rest."