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Joke of the Day

"(New version) How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three, one to genetically engineer people small enough to fit in a light bulb, and two to do the rest."

"If you want to stop a bad habit... eat a cyanide capsule"

"Why was the London sperm bank so unsuccessful? The were only two donors. One came on the bus, the other missed the tube."

"There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who don't."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? ""BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T FUCKING COOK IT!"" -Gordon Ramsay"

"I recently earned 5 times the money I earned before 5x0=0"

"An oldie but a goodie: What do Pink Floyd & Dale Earnhardt Sr. have in common? Their last biggest hit was The Wall"

"What do you use to wipe off a table after breakfast? A ragamuffin. Knew it was a dadjoke as soon as I saw my 9 year old roll his eyes."

"Three Nazis walk into a BAR They all get shot."

"I had to factory reset my phone.. I found Nickelback on it"