145500

Joke of the Day

"Dad, what do you call the guy who made every gay as lovely as the next? Homo-Genius"

"I want to know what love is. I want you to show me. No, not you. You. On the left. Other left. No. Jesus Christ, I'll do it myself."

"I'll sleep when my iPhone's dead."

"what is 40 feet long and only has 3 teeth? The funnel cake line at the Arkansas state fair."

"Overheard a black guy asking the waitress for some crackers, so I stood up and yelled ""THATS OUR WORD!"""

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I don't jelly my cock down a bitches throat."

"Playing Frisbee with a five year old is amazingly similar to just running after a Frisbee."

"How do you describe the facial features of a man who shaves with sculpting tools? Chiseled."

"007 is fired, becomes a scientist. He opens meetings with, ""The name's Bond, Hydrogen Bond."" Everyone laughs. He cries in the supply closet."

"At which fast food restaurant is a hamburger happiest? Arthur Treacher's Fish and Chips!"