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Joke of the Day
"Why did the chicken cross the road? To go look for his flatmate."
Next Joke
"If at first you don't succeed, you're assembling furniture from IKEA."
"[Bruce Willis on his deathbed] Bruce: Viagra! Dr: Bruce this isn't the time- Bruce: Give me...a Viagra! Dr: Ok *Bruce Dies...Hard*"
"Mike Pence getting booed at Hamilton is the worst thing to ever happen to a politician at a play"
"Hey baby, is that a gun in my pocket? Get in the van."
"I put a downward force on the end of a lever arm in hopes to get a cold-cuts sandwich but ended up with a meatball marinara... TL;DR Weight a moment, wrong sub..."
"Holmes: ""I say, old bean, is that mud on your boots?"" Watson: ""No, shit, Sherlock"""
"Countries I can't believe Japan have not attacked: Wales"
"HH The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza place.. ..and says ""Please make me one with everything"""
"Salad tastes pretty good once you add some Nutella and throw away the salad."