144169
Joke of the Day
"what does a programmer and a photo have in common? They develop better in the dark"
Next Joke
"I built a lighthouse... but it blew away."
"Why can't dyslexics tell jokes? They always punch up the fuckline."
" My friend's dog died the other day so I surprised her by going out and getting her an identical dog. She was furious, she said *""what am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?""*"
"What do you get when you mix the atlantic with the titanic About half way"
"Shift the power at family gatherings by telling older relatives you didn't recognize them because they've gotten so big."
"TIFU by mixing up my sub order at subway. Whoops, wrong sub."
"Blind friend and a cheese grater I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. A week later, he told me it was the most violent book he ever read."
"At the coffee shop, I saw a German guy reading the first few pages of a book about WWII and smiling. Keep reading, buddy. Keep reading."
"Kids: *doing something they shouldn't* Me: Stop or I'll be mad Kids: *keep doing it* Me: Stop or Mom will be mad Kids:*stop immediately*"