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Joke of the Day

"What do you say when the Batmobile drives by? Na na na na na na na na BAT MAN What do you say when a stolen Batmobile drives by? Na na na na na na na na BLACK MAN"

"What makes a good Stalin joke? The execution."

"What dries your clothes but can also make you writhe around in agony? A tumblr."

"I'm so poor I can only afford Middle Ramen."

"Justin has his Beliebers. 1D have their Directioners. If I ever had fans/stalkers I'd call them Tomaskateers."

"Why does America spell colour without the u? because fuck u"

"What is gray and comes in pints? An elephant! edit: maybe I should say what is gray and cums in pints?"

"Why can't Harry Potter tell the difference between his cooking pot and his best friend? Because they're both cauldron"

"what did stevie wonder say when he recieved a cheese grater for Christmas? it was the most violent book he had ever read"

"What do you call someone who really likes balloons? Autistic."