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Joke of the Day
"Why put it in my calendar when I can just wait until someone texts me ""Where the hell are you?"""
Next Joke
"Where do men have the most curly hair? In Africa"
"They say history is written by the winners... But actually, history is written by historians and most of them are losers."
"I bought my epileptic boyfriend a strobe light for his birthday. He's gonna have a fit when he sees it."
"I once asked an Irishman ""Why do the Irish always answer questions with another question?"" He said, ""do we now?"""
"What do Australians and wetting yourself in the basement have in common? They're both incontinence down under."
"Saying ""oh my gosh you're getting so big!"" is cute and acceptable to say to a 6 year old. Not so much to an ex-girlfriend."
"Why are there so many Jews? It's the only race that's well accounted for."
"Photons don't have mass. Does that mean that the light of God doesn't go to church?"
"My OCD requires me to slit the throats of people who sing Christmas songs to themselves out loud in quiet workplaces. The Cops understand."