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Joke of the Day
"STOP holding secret meetings about my paranoia!"
Next Joke
"I really wish I knew who kicked the jack under the car which I was working on........ .......... the suspension is killing me."
"I call my wife ""Happy Meal""... She's not enough to satisfy me but she comes with a toy..."
"Bob Ross and Mr. Rogers fight for nicest person ever. Who wins? They both share the trophy"
"Me:Come in. It's not like I'm a serial killer. Him:*laughs nervously* Me: *laughing* u have to murder more than 2 ppl for it to be serial"
"[Coworker] Are you smiling at your stapler? No, just checking for spinach [Laughs nervously]. Oh, good. [Me, to stapler] Sorry baby I had to"
"I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode... I asked, Are you two an item?"
"Newark International Airport: You want urine on the floor? We got urine on the floor!"
"I've been to the dentist a couple of times So I know the drill."
"whats brown and... What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown and runny? Usain Bolt."