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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the construction worker that got arrested? He was handling his wood in public."

"Why did the pig have ink all over his face? Because it came out of the pen."

"Why is it called Armageddon? Because everyone will be *ermahgerd*'n"

"Who delivers Easter treats to all the fish in the sea? The Oyster Bunny!"

"I used to go to the physician just like you, but then I took an hammer to the knee."

"What do ghosts do when they're sad? They get in an elevator to lift their spirits."

"What do you call someone with no arms and no legs being towed behind your boat? Skip."

"Why can't the Chinese be Nazis? Two Wongs don't make a Reich"

"I spilled a whole case of forks today..... ...you could say I forked up real bad"

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I've never paid $100 to have a garbanzo bean on my face"