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Joke of the Day

"Does liking a sad status update mean I'm sympathetic for them or I like that they are sad?"

"Yoda tells a joke at the annual Christmas party. Why was five afraid of seven? Because Six Seven Eight"

"1st thing I do when I take a girl back to my bedroom is act like a stewardess & instruct her where exits are, oxygen masks, & life jackets."

"Now I ain't sayin' she a gold digger, but that hard hat and pickaxe are pretty suspicious."

"Yo momma so fat the last time she went swimming she chewed a divers foot and they closed down sea world."

"If everyone gets a dollar for every time I fuck a girl. They'd have none."

"Just think: right now, your body is cookin' up some poop."

"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot kill, the courage to blow up the things I can, and the wisdom to not get caught."

"I have a sore throat, a sinus headache, a paper cut, and I miss my kitties. No one has suffered as much as I have on a Friday."

"Hey geese crossing the road, u can fly."