140028

Joke of the Day

"My typo game is string."

"My buddy has a telescope but I don't think he uses it for astronomy. I asked what his favourite constellation was and he said, ""Samantha""."

"What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish."

"Relationships are a lot like algebra.. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?"

"I saved my girlfriends phone number as LOW BATTERY'. Whenever she calls and I'm not around, the wife takes the phone and plugs it to the charger unknowingly."

"You will feel dumb when we find out the guy who headshotted Harambe was from the future trying to prevent Planet of the Apes.."

"Wrong womam or wrong finger? Funny Joke A: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger? B: Yes I am, I married the wrong woman."

"My girlfriend doesn't know this, but I put a dollar in an envelope every time we have sex. That's all I'm spending on her for Christmas. So far, she's only getting a McChicken."

"What kind of fun does a priest have? None."

"How did the guy from Kentucky find his sister in the woods? Pretty good!"