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Joke of the Day

"Q: What do electric trains and breasts have in common? A: They're intended for children but it's the men who usually end up playing with them."

"My favorite exercise is a mix between a lunge and a crunch It's called lunch"

"I dont know why people are disappointed when they find out a celebrity crush is married.As if that was their only obstacle to being together"

"What's the difference between a priest and acne... What's the difference between a priest and acne? Acne waits until you're 14 to come on your face."

"[doctor's] INVISIBLE MAN: Am I cured doc? DR: Your tests are all clear IM: Is that good? DR: [talking to wrong empty chair] I'm not sure"

"Is it cocky to have 2 penises? I think its 2 cocky."

"Why don't cannibals like to eat clowns? Chronic depression makes the meat a little tangy."

"Disguise a mini-recorder as a walkie-talkie and play this at high volume: ""DO YOU COPY? IT'S A BEAR WITH HUMAN HANDS! A BEAR WITH--[static]"""

"I would suggest that Brazil build a bridge and get over it... but given their record...."

"You know whats sad? A depressed onion cutting itself."