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Joke of the Day

"Why did the M&M 's go to college? Because they wanted to be smarties."

"20 yr old mom: my child is my life I would give my own life for him 40 yr old mom: GET OFF THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW OR I WILL END YOU"

"What did the constipated mathematician do... ...worked it out with a pencil"

"The karate student kept killing all his teachers... I guess he became desenseitized"

"Why did the chick disappoint his mother ? He wasn't what he was cracked up to be !"

"Just picked up an unknown call with a ""Hello?"" An old woman said ""Joan?"" So, I can cross ""mistaken for a Joan"" off the bucket list."

"What is the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman? Ironman is a superhero, Ironwoman is a command."

"nothing says FUCK YOU like a restaurant giving you one napkin with your takeout order"

"Donald Trump was just issued a notice by the IRS Ordering him toupee up."

"I went to a karaoke bar last night. I went to a karaoke bar last night that didn't play any 70's music... at first I was afraid, oh I was petrified."