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Joke of the Day

"Just picked up an unknown call with a ""Hello?"" An old woman said ""Joan?"" So, I can cross ""mistaken for a Joan"" off the bucket list."

"A bee is willing to end it's own life just to cause you a tiny amount of pain. I can relate to that level of pettiness."

"Most hookers don't give a fuck because it's much more profitable to sell a fuck."

"What is the difference between a bad haircut and a good haircut? 2-3 weeks tops."

"Another Sunday at Gym Church w/ Pastor Pumpz. We sang ""My Bod is an Awesome Bod"", ""Bod is Great Bod is Good"", and ""Be Thou My Protein"""

"I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day."

"Gloria Gaynor's ghost I woke up last night to find the ghost of Gloria Gaynor standing at the foot of my bed. At first I was afraid.......then I was petrified."

"*flips cap backwards* son, let's keep it real *puts on another cap* the realest *puts on suit made of backwards caps* REALality. word."

"The guy who fell off the ferris wheel is at the hospital.. He's in fair condition."

"What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor."