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Joke of the Day

"I saw a Trump supporter getting jumped by 6 guys yesterday, I knew I had to do something. So I jumped in. He had no chance against 7 of us."

"""The sum of the cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrot divided by the mayo. That is Cole's Law."""

"Five years ago I asked the most beautiful girl in the world out on a date, today I asked her to marry me. She said no both times."

"I'm so depressed, Radiohead is cheering me up."

"To the women who keeps waking me up at 3AM by pounding on my door: I'm not letting you out."

"Coworker: it's dark already Me: I know, Dan. I have eyes CoW: it's only 5 'o clock Me: I KNOW DAN CoW: it's early Me: THAT'S HOW EARTH WORKS"

"What do you call a Cult that is hard to get into? Difficult"

"What is blue, green, red, yellow, purple, orange, black, brown, and gray? A box of crayons."

"What do you call a pasture full of cows masturbating??? Beef strokin-off"

"If you fall outta your car in your driveway, it's your own asphalt."