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Joke of the Day
"What is blue, green, red, yellow, purple, orange, black, brown, and gray? A box of crayons."
Next Joke
"I thought my son would like that I bought him a trampoline, but oh no. He just wants to sit and cry in his wheelchair."
"What did the elevator say to the escalator? Do you even lift?"
"What hand do you use to wipe your butt? Right or left? For those that answered right or left, you guys are gross I use toilet paper."
"I bought a new black router today... I think I'm gonna name it Martin Router King"
"What's the worst part about making out with a perfect 10? The cold feeling on your lips when you realize you're kissing the mirror"
"When I was younger I used to think I was a God. Most parents give their kids food, mine gave me burnt offerings."
"How can you tell a Sumo wrestler from a feminist? A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs."
"[math teacher] your homework looks like chicken scratch, but you got them all correct [later at home] I think she's on to us, mathmachicken"
"I ran into my ex husband the other day. I could have sworn the light was green."