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Joke of the Day

"You know how asparagus makes your pee smell? Well, I just heard from my father for the first time in 14 years."

"Hey guys ,wanna hear a joke about a broken pencil? Ugh never mind that , it's pointless."

"17: Want to see a movie? Me: Sure. 17: Afternoon show only, so no one sees us together. Me: Ok. *Posts pic on IG. Tags all her friends."

"""Remember that man you met for 5 seconds when you were 2 months old? Let me catch you up on his medical history"" -my relatives"

"What is Snoop Dogg's favorite note? High G."

"I like my girls like Han from Star Wars with a hairy Wookie."

"None of my relatives are members of any organized political party. They're all republicans."

"The internet is a place where you can make long-lasting friendships. You can also watch 2 girls drink diarrhea. Two sides to every coin."

"And this pickup line is broght to you by Budweiser.... And this pickup line is broght to you by Budweiser: ---Budweiser: and who do we have here, standing so pretty and so quiet?"

"What did the egg say to a pot of boiling water? ""I'm not ready to get hard yet, I just got laid!"""