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Joke of the Day

"17: Want to see a movie? Me: Sure. 17: Afternoon show only, so no one sees us together. Me: Ok. *Posts pic on IG. Tags all her friends."

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"It's like Nabisco doesn't even care their Birthday Cake Oreos will wreck my ass."
"What do you call a guy who is afraid of Santa? Claustrophobic!"
"Why are the labia on Japanese women oriented sideways instead of vertically? Goes better with their eyes."
"The stock market monitors Chuck Norris."
"A poll showed that North Korea is the happiest nation in the world! 100% of citizens reported being happy!"
"A British Major is stationed in the desert with his troops..."
"The New 20 dollar bill I have a serious question for you guys. If a woman gets payed $.75 for every dollar a man gets payed, does that mean that the $20 dollar bill will only be worth $15?"
"Jokes About ESl classroom What is the longest word in the English language? SMILES: there is a mile between the first and last letters!"""
"TO: Everyone who has been run over by a boat in Venice... ...my deepest gondolances."