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Joke of the Day
"What job did the farmer give to his learning-disabled child? Herder"
Next Joke
"What kind of noodles do they eat in the hood? Spaghetto."
"""Expecto me to be there"" Harry Potter RSVPing to a party"
"What's the difference between a house cleaner and a thief? The way they enter your house."
"Two guys are walking down the street when they see a dog licking its own nuts... First guy says, ""I wish I could do that"" The other replies, ""you should try petting him first"""
"I can never remember if X is hug and O is kiss or if it's the other way around, so sorry if our tic-tac-toe game starts off a little weird."
"*points to refrigerator* That makes things cold *points to stove* That makes things hot *points to self* That makes things awkward"
"Have you heard about the goodweather witch? She's forecasting sunny spells."
"I keep hearing about kids accidentally dying from trying to get an asphyxiation high. What happened to drugs, kids?! We still have drugs!"
"I went to a Chinese restaurant last night. I said ""Waiter, this beef is rubbery"" He said ""Thank you, I'm grad you rike it"""