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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a metrically inclined elderly assassin? A Killograndma."
Next Joke
"Two peanuts are walking down the road One is assaulted"
"This fly in my car is going to be very disappointed when it ends up at Walmart."
"Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris."
"Oh no I got so excited that you texted me that I accidentally replied 11 thousand times and then swung into your house on a rope"
"I like my bacon how I like my choice of copilot.... ....Chewie"
"I dated a mime that was a mistress Being tied up was a little complicated."
"Why was 6 afraid of 5? Because 7 8 9"
"We the People ~~We the People~~ We the electoral college"
"""I could stay awake just to hear you breathing...Watch you smile while you're sleeping..."" Aerosmith = Romantic Me = Restraining Order"