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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a sick elephant and seven days ? One is a weak one and the other one week !"

"Why does everyone make fun of Batmans old suit, the one with the nipples? Bats have nipples. Hell, that's the most sensitive part of a bat."

"Why do you never wanna see an elevator in a horror game? Cuz you know something's about to go down. Im sorry"

"My friend asked me ""if you could have any super power in the world, what would it be?"" I said Cold War Russia."

"We should hang out and stare at our phones."

"The bartender asks, ""what can I get you?"" A neutrino walks into a bar. (See it arrived before it set off... myeh)"

"I was once told I run like a gazelle But the guy who said it was in a wheelchair, so I took it with a grain of salt."

"Everyone's switching from the iPhone 5 to the iPhone 6 for an extra inch ...I sure hope my girlfriend doesn't do the same."

"Two Bass Drums and A Cymbal Fall Off the Roof. Buh-dum tssh"

"A man walks into a brothel.. The attendant behind the desk says ""Beat it. We're closed""."