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Joke of the Day

"""Is your refrigerator running?"" ""Hasn't decided yet,"" I say, winking at my refrigerator & hanging up. A ""FRIDGE 2016"" banner hangs above him"

"Dear masturbating astronauts... In space. No one can hear you cream"

"A black father asks his son how his exam went But the visiting hours finished before he could answer."

"Wanna piss a rhinoceros off? Hang his car keys on his nose."

"Every women should have four animals. A mink in the closet, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bed, and a jackass to pay for everything!"

"Heard they weren't celebrating Christmas at the University of Alabama... Couldn't find three wise men and a virgin."

"Why was Lindsay Lohan feeling sleepy? He was buying drinks."

"You can be the most beautiful woman on the planet but if you can't cook don't worry I can"

"You kids don't remember, but once there were sitcoms about something other than gay guys."

"My doctor made me do a urine test for fun. It was a piss-take."