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Joke of the Day

"Hey girl, are you a zero APR loan? Because I don't really understand your terms and you keep saying you have no interest"

"Is bb-8 hungry? No, BB-8."

"Knock, Knock Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? EEEEWWWWWW."

"Q: What do you call blonde twins doing bubble gum commercials? A: Double-dumb."

"If you drive a Hummer, I will assume you are a douchebag. If aforementioned Hummer is bright yellow, I will crown you their king."

"Two atoms are walking down the street... One of them says, ""Oh my. I think I've lost an electron."" And the other says, ""Oh my God! It's a talking atom!"""

"How do you circumcise a priest? Kick a little kid in the jaw."

"Register for a new blender on your baby registry. It drowns out the crying and makes margaritas. You're welcome."

"today, i learned that ""Donald Trump"" is an anagram of ""Tan Dump Lord"" ...it's like his parents knew all along"

"Why can't a bike stand on its own? It's two tired."