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Joke of the Day

"I'm 82 and I have the body of a 25-year-old supermodel. But it takes up too much room in my freezer... any suggestions?"

"Man in fatigues w SONY written on his forehead has handcuffed me&my sons to radiator & is forcing us to watch 8th Spider-Man reboot in 3 yrs"

"5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe."

"What do you call an artist with a brown finger? Picasso"

"What's the worst gear for America? Cruz control."

"A Montage Video of My Life Except every time I disappoint someone, it gets faster [0:08]"

"Why is there cotton in pill bottles? To remind black people that they were cotton pickers before drug dealers."

"I asked my pusher for something to burn that would get me stoned. He gave me the Koran."

"Johnny Depp would have made an excellent Catwoman."

"A blonde was watching the news and saw that two Brazilian skydivers died in a horrific accident. She responds with, ""two Brazilian? Is that more than a billion?""."