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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a library and asks for a book on shit punchlines. The librarian directs him to the correct section."

"I like my money like I like my women... Under the table."

"What do you call a gay guy in a wheelchair? Rolaids"

"I disagree with the comments around here about feminists being fat, ugly, disgusting, whiny bitches... Some of them are just ugly."

"WIFE: ""You look tired honey. How about a nice steak mashed potatoes and an apple pie for dessert?"" HUSBAND: ""No thanks. I'm too tired. Let's just eat at home."""

"My tree went missing..... so I took a picture of it and nailed it to a dog."

"Johnny was racing around the garden on his new bicycle and called out to his mother to watch his tricks. 'Look Mum! No hands! Look Mum! No feet! Waaah! Look Mum! No teeth!'"

"Obama has suspended fund raising activities In light of Mitt Romney's recent statements to the press, President Obama has decided to let Mitt Romney do his campaigning for him."

"Gay jokes aren't funny! I mean...Come on guys!"

"I dont know why people are disappointed when they find out a celebrity crush is married.As if that was their only obstacle to being together"