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Joke of the Day

"Gay jokes aren't funny! I mean...Come on guys!"

"Have you ever heard of Ethiopian food? Neither have they."

"I think my cats hate people as much as I do. Every time the doorbell rings, they hide under the bed with me."

"How are wives like cholesterol? If you ignore them for too long they'll probably end up killing you"

"The doctor overseeing Caitlyn's transition advised against more plastic surgery. One more facelift and she'll have a beard again."

"I'm proud of anyone who has quit doing drugs and alcohol, I don't want to hang out with you now but I'm still proud..."

"What did the bully say when he threw Michael J. Fox out of a 10 story window? Marty Mc. FLyyyyyyyyy!"

"All generalizations are false, including this one."

"Doctor: where does it hurt? Me: [shows him an empty bag of Cheetos]"

"Thursday is like your high school boyfriend. It feels good but you know something better is right around the corner."