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Joke of the Day

"*walks into Best Buy* *points to CDs* ""May I have 4 sound bagels please"""

"If 2 people having sex..... If 2 people having sex is called a twosome, and 3 people having sex is called a threesome, then I can see why they call you handsome."

"What's the difference between my grandma and a baby? My grandma doesn't die when I fuck her."

"I was arrested for assault with a chicken. The cops suspected foul play."

"What was the main difference between the war in Vietnam and the war in Iraq? George Bush had a plan to get out of Vietnam."

"Last year I joined a support group for antisocial people.we haven't met yet."

"The first rule of breast club is you having them and that's good enough for me."

"A waitress approaches a table full of jews. She asks, ""is anything alright?"""

"People say drugs are bad, but I'm calling complete BS on that. I've only been on meth for 20 minutes and I'm already the king of Jupiter."

"Divorce is tough on some kids. Others are just happy to be single again."