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Joke of the Day

"After incorrectly spelling my symptoms at least 100 times, WebMD kicked back ""Listen idiot, you're drunk. Just go lay down"""

"I just gave my new secretary a sexy dress for her first week's salary. Next week, I'm going to raise her salary."

"To bad this upcoming storm isn't called Harry Because: https://imgflip.com/i/gumlv"

"I like my girls like I like my windows... 7"

"Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a nit Will you get out of my hair !"

"What is logic? A mute telling a deaf guy that a blind guy saw a paraplegic running behind a bald guy while grabbing his hair."

"[murders Aquaman with some super absorbent paper towels]"

"Have you heard the one about the three bodies of water in Texas? Well, well, well..."

"I have benefits if anybody needs a friend."

"The cool thing about shaving all my pubes off is that I get to see exactly what my penis looked like when I was first born."