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Joke of the Day

"I always drink a cocktail before having sex My dad always told me ""You need a good screwdriver to really screw something""."

"Two people sitting in a park. They see 2 women, kissing, and whatsoever. Guy 1: I really like that, should we go up to them? Guy 2: Uh, lets be honest..."

"Me: Excuse me Father, what's the Wifi password? Priest: We're in Church! Me: Oh I'm sorry. What's the Wifi password, Amen."

"Donald Trump doesn't have one solid, concrete idea! Except for the wall."

"The cat is heat and keeps presenting herself to the dog I'm just sitting here with my finger hovering above the record button."

"Feminists: Look on the bright side... There will be more women in the White House than ever!"

"Just a heads up guys, M. Night Shyamalan dug a hole in my backyard and has been filming Mark Wahlberg yelling at it for 6 months now."

"What do being in the mafia and cunnilingus have in common... One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit!"

"What did the pirate say when he saw his kid lighting the ship on fire? Arrr son!"

"I've always wanted to play smooth jazz while making love... ...but apparently the bedroom is an inappropriate place for a drumkit."